Randall Kennedy, I Am Here For You.


By Tom Nardone

Let Me help you Randall

I received this comment today. I am not angry at Randall Kennedy. I think that Randall Kennedy simply needs my help. I don’t want to hurt him. I want to help him. The following is his comment to my article I wrote entitled“Telemarketers, I Am Begging You All. Come Back!!

Tom, I appreciate your narcissistic rants. Wow, blogs! What a wonderful medium for

The self-involved. What a fantastic catharsis for the guy with a decent verbal acumen

and an utter inability to do anything in life but be a complaining sheep. Go get ‘em Tom!

Why stop with telemarketers, Tom ? What about those low life people in the service

industry? Always expecting tips……. I gotta tip for ya, ” Don’t grow your corn in the winter.”

Bwaahaaahaa! Damn, maybe I can experience the bliss of people huddling over a

monitor and telling me how incredibly witty I am……..na I’m too busy living life. And

screwing with telemarketers, even in jest, is petty. Bet you aint doin the management

thing, are ya Tom? Lol

Randall, first of all, my wife loved your comment. You sound like an incredibly intelligent person. If you are serious about having your own blog, I would be happy to take you under my wing, and show you how to build an audience. There is nothing in the world like writing an incredibly funny position on something, and then come home and see how many people have determined that you are awesome.

Don’t sell yourself short. Don’t let the fact that you only have 3 followers on Photobucket deter you from greatness. OK so you tried to be relevant in the internet world, and you failed. Today will be a new day. Today I am offering my hand. Today I want you to make this a defining moment in your life. To prove my commitment to this belief, I have mapped out a blogger 3 steps to greatness Path. Just for you.

  1.  Follow my blog. First and foremost I need you to follow my blog. Just enter your email address above to the right and then click the button that says “BE AWESOME” Randall you are never going to be awesome until you surround yourself with awesomeness.
  2. Look & Listen. Randall you have to be aware at all times. Every time you go somewhere or do something you must at all times be aware; there is a blog inside you waiting to be written. Someone will be doing something remarkable somewhere that you can write about. Randall this will be new for you. Let me help you pull your head completely out of your ass. This is why you could not see, and this is why you could not hear. Master This!
  3.  Be and Recognize Awesomeness For this Randall, I want you to take a look at your life and completely re-evaluate it. I want you to realize that in the past nobody ever listened to you. The reason nobody ever listen to you was not because they were stupid or foolish. The reason is that you just had absolutely nothing, of worth, to say. I am committed to help you if you will commit to learn.

Sorry for the tough love Randall. I will admit I was for a moment I was impressed by your use of big words. I had to look one of them up. Being a blogger is about more than the words you use. It is about making those words hold the interest of your reader. You should consider your reader at all times while blogging. In this particular case Randall, you did not consider your reader.

I was your reader. You did not consider me, perhaps because you do not know me. If you knew me you would have realized a few things. You would have realized that this is a man who; killed his lawn so he would not have to cut it, a man who won’t recycle, won’t invest his money, doesn’t believe history, refuses to eat out, and recently sounded off with pride about the fact that he filed bankruptcy to eliminate his debt. Randall somehow you thought that person would give a shit about your opinion.

But Randall My blog did not start off Awesome. My blog grew to be awesome. It was made so by all of the people that I follow and those that read me and commented on my site. Even you Randall; you commented on my page, and this article would never have been written without your involvement. In a way this is the first meaningful writing that you have ever been a part of. In a way Randall, this is an article that we wrote together.

Well, that is what I have offered you. The question Randall is what are you going to do with it? Are you going to let it fall by the way side? Are you going to watch it fade away into nothingness? Are you going to sit around and stew about your 3 lousy followers on your failed Photobucket account?  or are you going to grab that bull by the short and curlies? That is my hope.

Randall I believe your destiny is that of a Fucking Titan of the blogging world. I will see you stand up and look millions in the eye as you tell them all “MY NAME IS RANDALL FUCKING KENNEDY AND I AM AWESOME!!!” You are going to eat mountains and drink rivers dry, and the sound of thunder will follow your footsteps.

Randall, I am willing to ask my followers to help you. I know they can. They have been a tremendous help to me. They love people. We all do, and Randall we all love you too. Randall I think I can speak for all of us when I tell you that you need to find love. The first person you need to love is yourself. You are not the guy that wrote those awful things.

Randall. You are a “somebody”. You are a beautiful person. There is an amazing human being that is a prisoner inside you.  Randall do the world a service, and let him out. damn it Randall I am dying to meet him. I know he is there Randall. Don’t let him die. Randall we are all Begging You don’t let him die.

Randall, release the beauty that lives within you. Must we all beg?

Help me. I can only spread so much bullshit by myself.
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