An Unforgettable Halloween w/ Kotex & Brody Bricker

Halloween-brody-brickerThis Halloween is remembered by many.

I have written about Brody Bricker before and some of you love him and some of you hate him. He was my best friend as a child growing up from the third grade through the seventh grade. He was a very bad kid and lived to cause mischief. Read of his other exploits here.

One Halloween when we were nine-years-old, I went to Brody’s house before we were to go out trick-or-treating. When I arrived, he did not yet have his costume on. I went as Batman and he was going to be Superman. When I entered his house his mother told me to go back to his room.

When I entered his room Brody said, “Hey Tom, Close the door”. He then opened his window and through a bag outside. I asked him what was in the bag and he said, “You’ll see.”

He put on his Halloween costume and we left the house. As soon as the door shut, Brody ran to the side of his house to retrieve the bag he had thrown outside. He said, “Hey, c’mon we have to go into the woods.” When we got there Brody started emptying the bag. He pulled out a sheet, a can of red spray paint, and a long piece of string tied to a square piece of cardboard. I asked him, “Brody man what is all this stuff?”

He explained it was his real Halloween costume. He took off the superman stuff and put it in the bag. He asked for my assistance to help him wrap himself up tightly with the sheet from head to toe. We were able to configure it so he could still walk and use his hands. His next request was for me to spray-paint him with the can of red spray-paint he brought along. I did as he asked but I still had no idea what he was supposed to be. That was until he put on his little white shower cap and tied the string to it and I noticed the piece of cardboard hanging from the end of the string said, Kotex®. He even put the little R next to the logo.

I said, “Brody No man. You can do this.” To which he replied, “It is already done let’s go.” Yes, on this Halloween,  he decided to trick-or-treating as a used tampon.

Brody-bricker-halloween

I knew I should not be involved with him on this one but my dad did say to stay with him while we were out and he did not want me walking the streets by myself on Halloween night. So I just went under the banner of obeying my father.

The very first house we went to was incredible. It was the home of a single man. We knocked on the door, and he opened it and when we said, “trick or treat” this man stared at Brody and said nothing. He stared for about ten seconds and then began laughing harder than I could believe. He could barely hold the bowl of candy. He was laughing and it went on and on. As he laughed he just looked at Brody and said, “You Win!!!”. With that he dumped half the bowl in my bag and the other half in Brody’s and then closed the door and shut off all the outside lights on his house. I am sure we made his Halloween.

We thought this was amazing and we could not wait to get to the next house. I really thought Brody was on to something.  We did not get the same warm reception at the next house. A lady answered the door dressed as Mary Poppins (I shit you not) and her small children were with her dressed as little angels. She took one look at Brody and she lost it. She ordered her two little girls away and told him how awful he was and literally chased us out of her yard.

As you might expect all of the men laughed and all of the women went psycho. We were getting way more candy because the men could not contain their laughter and they all felt the need to reward Brody for his imagination. I was equally rewarded by proxy.

We were having a blast but some woman must have called the police. We saw the blue lights coming down the road entering the street we were on and Brody said, “Hey I wonder who they are after” They stopped right in front of us and Brody started running. The cop told me to stay put, but he could not catch Brody because he was laughing so hard.

The police officer came back and told me to get in the car. I started crying because I thought I was being arrested. He let me sit in the front seat to convince me I was not in trouble. He wanted me to help him find Brody and to tell him how to contact his parents if need be. I remember the dispatcher mentioning all units to be on the lookout for a runaway tampon and she was laughing on the radio.

We drove a little more and the Police officer saw Brody running through some ones front yard and he hit the siren. This scared Brody, and he tripped. The cop got out and spoke to him a moment, and put him in the back of the car. I had to tell him how to get back to Brody’s house. The Cop was laughing so hard when we got there, he just got out of the car and I watched through the windshield as he escorted this tampon to the front door. The cop was laughing so hard he could not say a word. He just handed Brody over to his dad and walked back to the car.

I convinced him not to tell my dad what Brody had done, and he just dropped me off a little ways from my house. Brody was grounded for three weeks after that. His dad made him go to every house and apologize to them, for his portrayal of a used tampon. In addition to this he was not allowed to trick-or-treat ever again without a chaperone.

Happy Halloween Friends.

I am Tom Nardone, and you are welcome

tomboy

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4 Responses to An Unforgettable Halloween w/ Kotex & Brody Bricker

  1. ksbeth says:

    omg i loved this tomnardone

  2. Wow, your friend was pure genius. Too bad only half of society recognized that genius. I love that the police had trouble catching up with him because they were laughing. Well done, Tome.

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